Connecting with thoughts - My thoughts and Me

I started as a skeptic when I took up the thirty-day challenge.  I was not sure if I would be able to complete it successfully. The very first morning, I woke up to the question - Will I or Won't I? But the journey thereafter has been a fascinating one. As I kept writing, the topics kept coming. Barring a couple of occasions, I was able to keep writing. Finally, I reached this far. Now that I reached this far, I feel the thirty-day challenge is doable. You can aim to do almost anything. Read, write, meet, earn, exercise, take pictures... you can do literally anything as a thirty-day challenge. There is no doubt that if done well, the challenge creates momentum that helps you to keep going.  Going by my personal experience, I would strongly recommend setting up your own challenge. Set up a challenge that will help you become better or make you happy when you look back at the thirty days. In the process, you will learn some interesting life lessons and gain precious memories. Yo...

Have an idea?  Do give it a try.  You never know it might just work.  Better still you may know why it won't.  Even better, if you persist enough, you may just find a way to make it work.  But nothing ever happens without trying.  You won't ever know, how far you can fly, how high you can soar if you never ever give it a try.  Good things come to those who try.  Not just once, not just twice, keep trying a hundred thousand times.  In the process, you figure out something new,  You set new milestones to achieve So the next time you have an idea Do give it a try.  For you will never know until you try!

  The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. - Lao Tzu Big achievements are made through small yet concrete steps . No matter how big our dreams are, we can achieve them by taking small steps. Many who interpret the proverb as signifying the importance of small steps, miss out on its essence. No doubt, the small steps are important. Yet, one should not miss out on what the proverb tries to tell us. Yes, the single step is important and will make all the difference. It will set us on the path of achievement. No doubt about that. But what is more important is how to begin the journey. How to begin is the core. Beginning with a single step is the essence.  The first step is most important because we may have big plans, but they will not materialize if we don’t take that first step. They will not go anywhere if we don't begin. The beginning is key. Nothing happens without the beginning. A thousand dreams (I would say lakhs) die even before they begin.  At time...

There are times when it is better to let go of something than to hold on to it. It is important to realize and accept that some things are not meant to be. The more one tries to hold on to something, the more entangled one becomes. It is just better to let go. Let go of - a person, an event, an incident, a thing, or maybe a failure. Just let go of anything that is holding you back and draining you down. However, it is easier said than done. For most of us, letting go is hard. It’s a struggle to release people, things, or emotions we’ve grown accustomed to having in our lives. Yet, that is what exactly one should be doing.  Because it frees you up from obsessive thoughts and unhappy feelings. In the process, it creates space for those things that you really need to focus on. It is the space to start afresh with a new perspective and create something meaningful.  Always remember, the trees lose their leaves so that they are not weighed down by the season to come. Rather, they ar...

Not everything happens for a reason. Sometimes things just happen. That's it. There is nothing one can do about it. But we go looking for reasons. That is what we have been told for ages - Everything happens for a reason.  And we have all kinds of reasons. Fate, destiny,  divine plan, higher purpose, God's plan, for something better, or it was meant to happen. You keep getting some or the other inexplicable reasons which rarely makes any sense. Yet we continue to look for answers because we have been always made to believe everything happens for a reason. Just because something does not work out - it could be a business, marriage, education, divorce, death of a loved one, broken dreams - does not mean there have to be reasons for it. In fact, there are none. These reasons we seek become an escape route. We start using them to rationalize failure and loss. We have grown accustomed to becoming strong believers of cause and effect. So much so that it starts becoming a crutch we w...

At times it is better to step back. The best way to settle the muddied water is to do nothing. Just step back and let it settle. When it does settle down the view becomes clear.  A cluttered mind is the same as the muddy waters. To solve the problem of a cluttered mind, you do NOTHING – you step aside and let it be. With time, the disturbances will settle down on their own and you will get a clear and calm mind. The process of calming the mind is effortless. It happens on its own.  However, what you do need to do is step back. Stepping back helps you look at things from a different perspective. Always remember, measuring your success is as important as the action you are taking. Stepping back allows reflecting if both are in sync or not.  Avoid rushing through, for haste makes waste. Nothing ever in life is linear. Life moves back and forth, up and down. In such cases stepping back helps to analyze and realize the mistakes you are making. It is time to introspect and unde...

Little drops of water Little grains of sand, Make the mighty ocean, And the pleasant land. So the little moments, Humble though they be, Make the mighty ages Of eternity.      - Little Things, Julia Carney Little do we realize the power of small steps and the profound impact they can have. A small drop may not be a potential force in itself, but it adds to the strength of the ocean.  Little do we realize how these unimpressive drops add up to become a potent force. But when they do add up they transform the world around them. Unfortunately, we only see the transformation and not the little steps that went beyond that transformation. The changes are subtle and gradual for one to realize easily.  It took twenty-two years for Manjhi The Mountain Man to pave the way for healthcare facilities to reach his village. Each day for twenty-two years he fought the mountain which denied his wife a chance to live.  Michael Phelps didn't become the force to reckon with ov...

You can't push the envelope right on the word go. There's every possibility of a breakdown. But envelope in itself signifies safety within its limits. Whatever needs to be done is to be done within those limits.  Aviators used the term “flight envelope” to refer to a plane’s capabilities for a safe flight  ― it’s calculated by examining conditions like speed, altitude, engine power, and more. Within this “envelope,” it is theoretically safe to fly.  But that's not where growth happens. The growth happens when you start pushing the envelope. To "push the envelope” is to test those limits by going beyond set or established parameters. But you can't push it all at once because it may prove dangerous. The better way to do this is to build endurance steadily to go beyond. Each day keep taking a step forward like a toddler who steadily starts covering more and more distance. Alternatively, you may train like an athlete who focuses on getting better every day and then goe...

What exactly is the value of life? No, I am not talking about life from an insurance cover point of view nor significance of life from a business point of view nor from an economic value of life. I am looking at the value of life from purely the way one lives life. I am thinking about how the quality of life adds to the value of life. The following are few indicative questions to think and reflect upon. You may add your own or choose a totally different set of questions to determine the value of life.   What I am talking about is what difference does life make?  What happens when you die?  What would you lose if you die?  What would you gain if  from continue to live?  Who will cry when you die?  How different would life be if you continue to live?  How do the people around you see you?  Do they all value you the same or does each one see a different value?  Whilst you are at these questions do remember that the value of your life depend...

There is big joy in little things that we usually miss out on and rarely treasure. Yet it is these small little things that bring us joy. The remembrance of these little joyful things is more accidental than intentional. Fortunately, though, these little joys are stored deep inside the subconscious mind and get pulled out at opportune times. Seamlessly they blend into the narrative as if it was all about them.  Suddenly we remember and cherish getting wet in the rain, chasing butterflies, that tasty slushy after school, bargaining fare for an auto ride home, enjoying a cup of tea at a roadside tea stall, and many many more such instances which tug the heart. There was, is, and will be joy in those moments.  Yet along the way it is like we have forgotten to find joy in little things. An art that we perfected as kids. Be it refusing to get out of the bathtub, the joy of climbing up and down the stairs, or floating paper boats, clapping and smiling for no reason at all, we did it...

Rarely do we get everything right on the first go. The product or service which you are using is an outcome of trial and error. These errors though inherent are not intentional. They happen either due to lack of knowledge, nonavailability of knowledge or absence of any knowledge. Thus in such cases, the only option available is to make repeated yet varied attempts to attain success. Each failed attempt is an opportunity to analyze the failure, make the change and try again, thus discovering new knowledge in the process. The new knowledge tells us about what works and what does not and how things fit in. With each new discovery, the knowledge evolves and the learner comes closer to reaching the goals. In the process, however, there is every possibility that a solution may be accidentally discovered.     However, the learner needs to be observant, ready to learn, be prepared to conduct the experimentations in a systematic and repeatable manner but with variations. Last but ...

Once the F1 driver puts on his helmet and settles into the cockpit of his racing machine, he is not on his own. The pit wall team and engineers and backend team are constantly monitoring the race and the conditions right from word go to the end of the race. The engineers analyzing the data, practice/race briefing and debriefings, and team strategy sessions result in constant feedback.  The constant monitoring and evaluation of on-track events, race cars, competing drivers, speed of cars, lap timings, the distance between competing cars, and continuous communication with the driver hold the key to success in the race.  Moreover, the strategy that is planned can never be a fixed, immutable thing. It is subject to change during the race to take into account the unpredictable events that happen in every race. Collisions, technical glitches, wear and tear of tyres, change in weather, brake failure and a lot of many other things may and do go wrong. These incidents force the teams t...

In motorsports, a pit stop is a pause for refueling, new tyres, repairs, mechanical adjustments, a driver change, as a penalty, or any combination of the above. These stops occur in an area called the pits, most commonly accessed via a pit lane that runs parallel to the start/finish straightaway of the track and is connected to it at each end. Along this lane is a row of garages (typically one per team or car) outside which the work is done in a pit box. Pit stop work is carried out by the pit crew.  (Source Wikipedia) .  The outcome of the race depends a lot on what happens during the pit stop. A perfectly timed and executed pit stop is key to success in motorsport. Races have been won and lost because of pit stops. One can safely say that without a pit stop you won't last long enough in the race.  Though we may closely and keenly follow or look out for the pit stop while watching the sport, we rarely take a pit stop for ourselves. Deep down we all know it is important t...

Just because you have always been winning does not mean you will continue to win. Just because you have been a consistent performer does not guarantee you are going to win the next time. Just because you launched a disruptive product/service does not mean your next launch will be groundbreaking. Just because you have been the go-to man does not mean that you are going to be the man for all seasons.  Sooner or later things are going to change. The needs are going to change. The people are going to change. The technology and environment will change. The pieces you need to complete the big picture will change.  And then whatever has held will you in good stead will no longer be so. It's not that you have been discredited or are no longer good, it's just that the rules of the game have changed, the way in which one competes has changed.  Until and unless you have bothered to keep abreast and adapted yourself to the changing world and cracked the new code, just because will do...

What are we meant to do with the time we have? Read? Write? Play? Earn? Live? Build? Find meaning? The list could go on and on and the answers will definitely vary for each person. But do we ever seriously give a thought to the question? Do we ever try to figure out what we are meant to do?  When do we realize what we are meant to do? Does it happen consciously or subconsciously? Is it an outcome of rigorous pursuit or do we just stumble upon it? Does previous experience count or is it a new perspective that opens up the gate to find the answer?  What happens to us when we find the answer? Are we transformed? Do we create a masterpiece or leave a legacy? Do we find the true essence of life and its meaning?  Whatever the answers may be but the question is definitely worth pursuing - what are we meant to do with the time we have?  For the purpose of life is a life of purpose and what better way of finding it than understanding what we are meant to do with the time we h...

Derek Sivers in his now-famous " How To Start A Movement "  TED talk talks about how the lone nut is responsible for starting a movement.  Using a video of a shirtless dancing guy who is least concerned about people around him Sivers goes on to highlight important leadership lessons and insights.  But all said and done, it takes guts to be the lone nut. Because you need a strong belief in yourself to stand out and be ridiculed for what you're trying to do. Till the time you find a follower the journey can be a long and arduous one. You need to be able to hang in there.  Hang in till the time people start believing in you and following you. The lone nut usually believes in a cause worth fighting for. He/she may be avoided by the people but it's him/her paving the path for the movement to start.  The lone nut is always going to be one fascinated by or passionate towards something different which may have nothing to with what's happening around. He/she might be 10 ...

What if... Two words to help you think beyond. To reimagine existing possibilities and try out new ones as well.  Thinking what if helps us to recreate a scenario and look at it from multiple perspectives. Better still, we can discard the scenario itself and create an entirely new premise.  What if is a premise that gives us ground without any boundaries or limits to explore and tap into. There is no limit to how creative, outrageous, and silly this what-if question may be.  But it surely helps us to stretch our imagination and think beyond. It compels us to change/shift our paradigms in the way we see, interpret and do things. And believe me when I say some of the most notable and disruptive innovations of tomorrow will stem from thought processes aligned to these two words... What if.....? 

  Just think beyond and not outside the box.  When we think outside the box, the box still remains and acts as a point of reference. However much we want to be away from the box, we will still think in terms of the box.  Consider, for example, that you are in a car going from one City A to another City B. What’s the fastest way to get there? Most people simply try to map out the most efficient route. Others take it a step further, weighing factors such as traffic, time of day, and rest stops. And still, others develop a plan to rotate drivers so they can limit stops and drive all night. Most of the possible options you will think of will center on the car and traveling by road. The car becomes the box. The fastest way would be by air travel. When the boxed television sets were around everyone still thought and designed television sets as boxed. It continued till someone pushed the envelope and designed a really flat-screen television set.  One of the victims of faili...

Life can get pretty tough if you have not decided on what's next. Because each time you achieve or do something on the go, you have to keep thinking about what's next.  Spontaneity is good to an extent. It can get you to a particular point, but then after you have to be sure about which way are you going to go or what you are going to do next.  There will come a time when you will have to sit down, reflect, and ask some tough questions to yourself. Do some soul searching in your quest to find out what is next.  Because you can't be aimlessly be shooting out in the dark and hoping to hit the target. Knowing where, what, why, and how you are going to aim for the target drastically improves and enhances your chances of hitting the target.  So the next time you think about what's next, think of it as a series of goals and objectives to help you achieve the big picture. Preparation combined with a dash of spontaneity takes what's next to the next level.

Gone too soon is a bitter truth that hits hard when you have fond memories of the person to look back and smile upon.  However inevitable it may be, death is something we are least prepared for. Rarely do we acknowledge death and prepare for it. It is far easier to know we are going to die one day. We all know it. We are destined to die the moment we are conceived.  But it is one thing to know and totally another to realize and accept we are going to die. How many of us live as if we are going to die today. Will we be really at peace preparing for death? Why is it that we wait for someone to tell us we don't have much time to start valuing time?  We always hear someone or other say, “If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you’ll most certainly be right.” Most times we have a hearty laugh about it but ignore what it tells us. How many times do we ask ourselves if today is going to be the last day of our life, what is that we would do?  Steve Jobs in his ...

Once upon a time, there was a wise Zen master. People traveled from far away to seek his help. In return, he would teach them and show them the way to enlightenment. On this particular day, a scholar came to visit the master for advice. “I have come to ask you to teach me about Zen,” the scholar said. Soon, it became obvious that the scholar was full of his own opinions and knowledge. He interrupted the master repeatedly with his own stories and failed to listen to what the master had to say. The master calmly suggested that they should have tea. So the master poured his guest a cup. The cup was filled, yet he kept pouring until the cup overflowed onto the table, onto the floor, and finally onto the scholar’s robes. The scholar cried “Stop! The cup is full already. Can’t you see?” “Exactly,” the Zen master replied with a smile. “You are like this cup — so full of ideas that nothing more will fit in. Come back to me with an empty cup.” Insightful and compelling as the anecdote may sound...

The one most important thing likely to happen when we start  practicing silence  is that sooner or later we will be compelled to look within.  The fear of having to look within and facing our inner self is the major reason why we are never comfortable with silence. We are scared that we may find ourselves on the wrong side or might as well have to completely change our perspective towards life. These things are difficult to acknowledge let alone accept.  We are comfortable in a world where the blame for something lies solely on external reasons for any debacles that occur in our life. Therefore we are unwilling to reflect and act on it. At times we fall prey to seeing ourselves as helpless victims who can't do anything to change the situation. In such a case the only way forward is downhill and bouncing back may seem an uphill task. In worst cases, it may be looked upon as a point of no return. These are perils of a mind that looks outside.  But there is another...

One of the effective ways to reflect is to practice silence. Practicing silence can connect us, ease our minds, and put us in touch with ourselves. However, we should not confuse being quiet with practicing silence. Being quiet is, in some way, equivalent to keeping our mouth shut—not making our voice heard. But being silent is more about entering a sacred place within ourselves.  Being silent allows us to channel our energies. It gives us the clarity we need to calmly face challenges and uncertainty. Each day of practicing silence at the start of the day can be a time for collecting our thoughts, training our minds, and deciding how we want to enter into the day.  An ideal time for practicing silence would be an hour.  However, engaging in silence may not come easily at first.  Silence can make us uncomfortable because we’re so used to distracting ourselves from what we’re feeling—from difficult emotions like fear, resentment, or anger.  Therefore establishing...

Every day set aside a few minutes for reflection. Maybe at the start of the day, middle of the day, end of the day. That should not be of concern. But what should definitely matter is setting aside that time slot and religiously following it.  This time may be used to reflect on all that happens within, with and around you. Set all distractions aside. For those few minutes forget the world around and immerse yourself into the world within you. But remember reflection needs practice. It requires us to slow down, to pause and be still. To begin with start with setting aside 3 mins and then slowly and steadily increase it up to 10-15 minutes.  At its simplest, reflection is about careful thought.  It is the process of bringing your attention to what’s happening in your life in a mindful and open-minded way. But the most useful reflection involves the conscious consideration and analysis of beliefs and actions for the purpose of learning. Reflection that compels us to challen...

  Rarely do we recognize the power of observation. It is even rare that we realize we have an inherent ability to observe things. Observing is the quality of the human mind to notice the series of activities, events, things happening around us. This ability though remains limited to the confines of the subconscious mind.  We never quite practice observation intentionally, yet our mind keeps registering changes that it observes and communicates these changes with us as and when the need arises. These observations help us sail through our daily routine. We understand and connect with people, build relations, identify things and objects, we notice change albeit subconsciously. Just imagine the wonders it would do when we use the power of observation intentionally and effectively. What will happen when we start noticing details which we otherwise miss or ignore?  Well for once we will start gathering minute details or information from anything which normal people might ...

We have to acknowledge that we have never quite mastered the art of asking questions. Though questions do have the power to reshape and transform destiny, a lot depends upon how we ask them. It is not wrong to say that the quality of questions decides the quality of answers.  And yet when it comes to asking questions we are never quite able to nail it. We struggle to frame them properly. Therefore, it does not come as a surprise when Einstein says that if he were given an hour to solve a problem he would spend fifty-five minutes defining it and use only five minutes to solve it. it speaks volumes about the importance of asking the right questions. It is not that we are totally averse to asking questions. Journalists, lawyers, law agencies, doctors, scientists and researchers amongst others have to be really good at asking questions. Everything that they do depends upon the types of questions asked. Though questions are relevant and pertinent for all of us at each and every stage of...

There's not a single day that passes without us having any questions in our minds. And then there are times when we have a hell of a lot of them. They simply never cease to exist. They come in all forms, shapes, and sizes. We have questions about what is happening to us, with us, within us, around us.  We have questions about why it is happening to us. But little do we realize about the power of questions. Questions have the power to reshape and transform destiny. Every major innovation, invention, or change has been a result of a question. Someone somewhere thought a little differently and asked why? Why not? How? And the results are there for all of us to see. From time immortal it is the questions that have helped mankind to evolve and progress.  From Bhagwaan Buddha to Jesus to Abraham Lincoln to Gandhi to Nelson Mandela... All asked questions that compelled us to think and find answers. Answers that helped us become better. Right from history to science to medicine to mat...

How do we look beyond what we see? We can, by unlearning.  Unlearning means developing an alternative mental model. It is a different way of looking at things. It's about trying to explore more and broadening our horizons. It's about acknowledging there are many narratives and different stories other than the one we know or what we have learned. For when we learn, we add to our existing knowledge and build on it.  Unlearning on the other hand is about understanding that our current learning may be flawed, biased, or needs to be challenged. It is about stepping outside our mental models taking a fresh look at what we hold in our minds. It's very much about acknowledging and accepting a different one from what we see. There are high chances that what we were seeing or holding true could be incomplete and ineffective.  Unlearning, thus, is the process of realizing that something which we learned earlier is incorrect, ineffective, or obsolete, admitting it, and de...

What you see is what you get goes an old adage. Most times, if not all, we end up seeing what we feel we are seeing. And consider it to be absolute truth. Because that's what we experienced. That's what we know. But just cause we experienced or felt something does that become the truth? Does our perception of the things, event or an incident hold true because we feel that way or is it something beyond what we know?  Often times when we know what we know it is just one side of the story. We never know or realize about the other side. This happens for the simple reason because we have never bothered to empathize or experience firsthand the trials and tribulations of the other side. We just assume the things would be the way we want them to be or the way we see them. Rarely do we see or think about the way things are. This happens for the simple reason because we go by what we know, what we have felt and experienced.  What we forget in the process is that there is another side to...

Will I or won't I? That's the question I woke up with today morning. Strange question to wake up with one might think. But there's nothing strange if you went to sleep the previous night with the promise to yourself to take up the 30 days challenge, totally out of the blue. 30 days 30 posts, I said to myself while heading to sleep. The fact that September has 30 days added fuel to the fire.  So I went to sleep, feeling happy that I am going to go for this challenge without batting an eyelid. It must have been some hell of thought for I dozed off happily. My joy, however, was short-lived. Because I woke up to the question - will I or won't I? I had not given any thought to what I am going to write about nor had any notes made to fall back on.  Suddenly, I realized how vulnerable I could be. I felt kind of foolish to have made such a promise to myself. I mean who does that, just say yes (even if it is to yourself) without realizing or thinking about what you are getting i...